Monday, February 13, 2006
Isn't it funny
I have a confession to make. When I first came to Christendom I had no intention of staying the full four years. I had always intended to stay just just for the core curiculum and to leave after the second year for a larger college where I could earn a more lucrative degree.Two things put a stop to this plan.
The first was grades. I hade no idea that Christendom would be so difficult and that I wouldn't be able to make high enough marks for state schools to consider me. Christendom turned out to have people who were far smarter than I had anticipated. I was both delighted and dismayed to find that the people (inculding the freshmen) here were far smarter, more educated, more interesting even, than any I had found in any place, school or thing till now.
The second was you guys. That is, my good friends of the chaplet. You people, aside from my close family, are probably some of the best friends that I've had ever. I do not say that lightly. This was obvious within the first few months. I knew that it would be very unlikely for me find such a close-nit group of friends in any larger institutions. (none that I could truely be part of anyway) The past year and a half have been some of the mst fulfilling of my life. I can honestly say that due to my contact with you my horizons have never been so broad. Thank you for that.
So, it was because of my grades and even more because of my friends that I stayed at Christendom College.
Both of these have changed.
Well... Over this summer and fall grades became no longer an issue. I test applied to local schools and got accepted, barely. By grades went up last semester also and should stay up so any future applications should do at least as well. I now know that I'll be able to go to a different school if I so choose.
With regard to friends, this will be a long story but here goes. When we first arrived here, none of us were attached so to speak, that is we were all single. Ah the glorious days. It didn't take long to notice that 'relationships' and boy-girl issues would be a big deal in the months to come. I remember well in the first few weeks a certain person jealously commenting how a certain someone looked soooo cute with a certain someone else. Naturally, I groaned at this. Intrigue and jealousy and middleschool antics are far from my idea of fun. However, I realized that the issue was a fact of life and although I did my best not to contribute outwordly to the immaturity I did have my share of it right from the beginning.
Some of you already know this and might think they have an idea where I'm going with this. Those who do please read through anyway because that's not what this is about.
Anyway, I remember that all nighter, at the end of which that certain someone, tired to the point of insanity, confessed an undying emotion to another someone, right in front of a third someone, who became intensely upset at the both of them. I remember how that led to the first fight, and also the first group of those 'freshmen couplets.' I remember how a certain friend became so obsessed with a certain other friend that he neglected his health and friends. I remember the grief that this caused everybody. I remember this problem being cured with time and patience.
We all grew up though. By the end of freshmen year we had all either gotten over the first 'freshmen couplets' and or heart filled crushes or were on the road to recovery. We made it through this because we were good friends and more importantly good people. I believe it's the fact that we all were good christian people that we could be such good friends.
Now I remember next fall and the new wave of 'sophemore couplets.' This was much better than the previous year. We were not out of the woods yet (technically we never will be), but these were much more mature and much more stable. I remember one, or two, at a time each member of the chaplet forming a relationship and becoming hopefully set for life. The only downside is in fact a good sign: Everytime someone coupled off, they spent more time with each other thatn with the chaplet. So slowley the members of the chaplet began to drift apart, not in actuallity but in practice. With each absence, the remaiming members resituated themselves to reflect the absence.
Now here comes the point of this story. I apologize if not everyone was supposed to know yet but two of the three members of the chaplet who had not yet coupled off have coupled off with each other. This leaves one solitary individual with too much free time on his hands. His best bachalor bud will no longer be and he will be left with little to do with the rest of the chaplet.
We will alway be good friends I hope but we will never be as constant companions as we all were in the beginning. For which reason, reason to stay #2 is no longer as significant as it once was.
I would like to say that this past few months have been an elation for me. I know that everyone else has been having their troubles with this and that, but whle you all were breaking and repairing friendships I was breathing sighs of relief and emancipation. Of many things that have been troubling me I may finally be free. No, you don't know entirely what I'm talking about. Some of you know part but none know all. That is okay, exactly how I intend it. I don't like to burden others with my own issues. (Granted I'm writing this existential whine but the blog was suffering so I have an excuse.)
I'm not yet sure to whether I seriously intend to transfer. Christendom affords more opportunities than I initially anticipated but I'll really have to capitalize if I intend to stay. There is a lot to think about in this debate and it makes my head dizzy everytime I do. But, I'd like you all to know that I'm considering it, for financial reasons, vocational reasons, and others. I wish you all very well.
PS. I didn't proofread this so please disregard anything that doesn't look right or make sense.