Sunday, November 20, 2005

Springtime for Hitler

It’s definitely fall and Hitler is definitely not taking over, but couples have. Following the philosophy of Fr. O’K, people should be coupling up in the spring (hence the springtime part.) But I guess they just can’t wait. To be fair, it’s really not everyone, just the sophomores. It makes sense that they are coupling up now, we’ve all known each other for about a year and half now. We’ve all gone through tests, papers, finals, dances, dorm life, breaks, and friend problems together. Everyone’s finally comfortable enough with that ‘other person’ to either date or notdate* them. What is notdating, you may ask. It is a phenomenon usually found at Christendom (or your local junior high.) It’s when two people spend almost all (or all) of their time together and no guy in his right mind would ask the girl out for fear of what her notboyfriend would do to him. But when asked, the couple (notcouple?) vehemently deny any form of datage. Whatever.

As I was walking back from the library, I was thinking about one of my girlfriends (who will remain nameless. . . *quack, quack*) and her notboyfriend and my other girlfriend and her boyfriend who is fuzzy (I think I can say that). I was deep in thought, but then I noticed a couple in front of me and realized that over the weekend, I’d been seeing them be more of a couple and pondered exactly when that happened. That set off a chain of events. All of my really good girlfriends are going out with someone (or notdating). Wait a minute! Praise be! There is one sane person left, my fellow Dominican friend whom I will be spending a lovely Thanksgiving with. And most of my guy friends are either dating or notdating (mostly with the aforementioned girls.) That’s when I realized that there are only three members of this blog that are unattached (save Tokyo. Sorry Tok, you never blog.) But my guy friends who are dating (or notdating) have another good guy friend who either they room with or live right across the deck from each other and are always together. I don’t want to say that they are couples, because that's just not right and totally not true. (Don’t hurt me, please.) Oh I better stop talking.

Anyway, it just feels like Cupid has taken over the sophomore class (that’s the Hitler part, I guess.) Now by rights, I can’t complain. I’ve said many times that it just wouldn’t do to have nunnish thoughts and a guy. That would just be bad. So why am I complaining?

Maybe my problem is my girlfriends are too pretty. Seriously, they’re all really good looking girls. (Here, Quia, hold still, I’m just going to put some pepper on your face. . . No Carducci, I don’t know who drew a mustache on your face with permanent marker. . . Don’t worry, Jericho, your eyebrows will grow back. . . Laura-friend I don’t know what you’re talking about, your hair isn’t purple. . . PBJ Girl, what do you mean someone cut your hair all lawnmower like. . . Fitz, do you mean to tell me that someone put ink in your tea. . . ) Okay, maybe that’s not the answer. But it’d be funny!

I think I need to find a good girlfriend WHO REALLY ISN’T NOR WILL BE DATING ANYONE. *frustrated sigh* So consider this an application. Requirements for being The WP’s single friend: First of all, you must be single and plan on staying so. Entering into a dating or notdating relationship will void the contract. (Social contract?) Second, you must be a girl, preferably a sophomore or junior. Freshman aren’t dating because they are freshman and I don’t want to go through the trouble of finding a new friend next year when my freshman friend, now sophomoric, falls for the guy of her dreams. And seniors will be gone by the end of the year, thus needing to redo this next year, also. Thirdly, you can’t be a girl who spends all her time in her room or at the library studying. No, you must be able to have fun. Having fun is essential. You must also be friends with my stupid friends and their significant others. Please leave applications in comment section. Thank you for taking the time to fill this out.

It is now time for me to write my theology paper. Maybe if I spent more time on my homework and less on what my friends are doing, things would go more smoothly all around. So I’m going to stop whining and start being productive.

* Emily G, Nun Run, 2005. All other references to notdating in this post should darn well consider themselves cited.


  1. You missed it all happening...


    Lots of freshmen moments...

    Don't miss that...

    Matthew's theme song now is "Born to Be a Bacholar" be Gaelic Storm.
    All hail the DBA.

    God Bless.

  2. "I was born to be a Bachelor,
    I’ll never walk down the aisle,
    Me mam still makes me breakfast,
    (I’m) Livin’ it up in shtyle,
    Girls, ye’ll never catch me,
    Stayin’ single, that’s the plan
    I was born to be a Bachelor,
    Sure I’m yer only man! Hah?"

    Ok, I'm not actually going to be a bachelor until I'm 44, unless I'm a priest, in which case I'm married to my Lady Church. In the other case, that is, I find someone, I should be wary. Not only will I be kicked out of the DBA but I'll have to find a new theme song. Is a pretty girl really worth that?

  3. No, she's not. Stay a bachelor with us, er, Andrew. I'll be a bachelorett.

  4. Andreth8:34 PM

    I know the feeling Jenne. It's dreafully hard for me not to get sour grapish about all this. Oh, and I love your "notdating" and "datage" terms. They fit precisely. Unfortunately I don't fit all of your qualifications, since I do spend most of my time studying or in the library. :(

  5. Anonymous9:27 AM

    Excuse me, I think I have a copyright on that term, "notdating." Because of your class, I might add. So, appropo perhaps, but please give credit where credit is due.

    -Emily G.

  6. Anonymous12:28 PM

    LOL! Thanks :-D

    I think Notdating would be a good thesis topic...perhaps by the time 4 years is up we will be able to write it, huh Jenne?

    -Emily G.